100 HP MAX HP 100 EN MAX EN Dipping into the abyss of drunken idiocy, Briar was starting to feel a bit uncertain about her body's ability to hold liquor. Was this what lightweights felt like? She'd only had, what... sixty mugs of ale? That shouldn't have her so awkward on her feet. And yet, the smell of insanity caught her nose. She just had to play in the maize. That's just what cats did, wasn't it?! She'd fearlessly bugged a giant- well, to her, the man certainly was. The man wasn't nearly as coated in alcoholic bliss as she was, but he was willing to deal with her, or so it seemed. @Alonso Thorlion was a bit of a gruff looking guy, in her opinion- overly built, maybe to the point she'd get on his case if she were his doctor. Then again, he was also super fuzzy, which was kind of funny to her. Fuzzy. That was a fun word. It made her touch the corn as they wandered the maze of it, trying to find some fuzz on it too. "Aww. No capiters yet. This corn needs some *hic* caperiters. I wonder if they'll use this stuff to make more dinks. What do you think, ol' man~? Want some dinks with me later~? We'll have corn ale for our victory patty~" Navigating the Maze / (Roll) DH - Maize Run 94 + 0 = 94 Maze Progress: 94 / 500
90 HP MAX HP 90 EN MAX EN Why. Why the fuck did he not log out? Alonso had not binged on alcohol yet, but knew the side effects were about to kick in any second. Last he checked his body was wandering throughout the faire rounds, coming across what appeared to be a small Felis, who had taken a liking to him. However, 'Taken a Liking' equated to a constant barrage of questions like a drunk significant other who had way too much to drink. God the stench of booze just emanated off @Lady Briar. "Goddamn you're... you're a drunk one," the bearish man said. Oh, and the alcohol must have had an enormous effect on the cat girl. If she did not see the Giant Caterpillar staring them down just itching for a fight, then today was not going to be their day. Snarling, Alonso throw a punch at the oversized insect, "Open your eyes, cause your fucking caterpillar IS RIGHT HERE." Fighting Monster / Roll 25 + 20 = 45 Giant Caterpillar: 105 / 150
90 HP MAX HP 90 EN MAX EN She was looking the wrong direction to see the creeper at first, but when she did, she laughed in hysterics and pulled out her polearm with drunken glaze over her wide, maniacal eyes. "Goodie! Cat litter! Time to make a mess of it~" Her words were hard to tell if she was making a bad joke or just still horrible with words from the liquor on her tongue. Her throat was burning, but not as much as her desire to fool around. With a swift jab, she tried to hit the blurry creature in her vision with a consistent smile. Even as it barely did any damage at all, she pulled her lance back to hug it for a moment. "Oh, I love poking things with my pointy stick~ And if I'm lucky it'll get nice and bloody~ Won't that be fun?" Fighting Monster / (Roll) DH - Maize Run 22 + 15 = 37 Monster Name: 68 / 150
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN He stumbled towards the creature's left, getting slammed by the bastard's rear half. Whomever was running this game was about to have a severe talking to once all of this was said and done. Fists began to fly, pummeling into the Caterpillar's thick hide. On the plus side, these things never grew this big back in reality. "Yeah well keep stabbing it with your pointy stick and we can get on with our lives," Alonso said. He did not want this thing to be his cat litter. Briar, by all means, was free to do what she willed with it after the fight. Fighting Monster / Roll 46 + 20 = 66 Giant Caterpillar: 2 / 150
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN Instead of going and poking it one more time, Briar began to chant something weird sounding. Something worthy of her title as 'Chaos Incarnate' (even if the only one that called her that was her!). Considering how big the giant blob of... whatever her confused and blurry eyes were seeing. "Wonemos rea stel, leb ekil oyo!" Her weird words caused the caterpillar to start to crumple until it ran itself into one of the walls, trying to kill itself to get a noise she created for only it out of its head. It died from self-imposed head trauma, which only left the cat laughing as she dipped her lance into it's silenced head. "We're done here~ I made my mark~ Let's find the exit mister. Cat litter's dead~ Isn't that fun!?" Fighting Monster / (Roll) DH - Maize Run 42 + 15 = 57 Giant Caterpillar: -55/150 DEFEATED
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN Blank stares rained from the bearish Felis's eyes, unsure as to how he should proceed with the state of drunk Briar was in. "You have got to be one of the most psychotic people I've met here so far. Damn drunks," he said. Alonso glanced in different directions, trying to figure out his options. It was a maze, and as such, even he had no idea which way to head out. Memories relating to directions began to flood his mind as well, something about his deceased wife nagging him to stop and ask for directions. He knew how to get around damnit! Some maze was not going to stop him. Wandering over to Lady Briar, Alonso bent down to swoop her over his shoulder and start walking off, "We're going, NOW. PLEASE." Navigating the Maze / Roll 2 + 0 = 2 Maze Progress: 96 / 500
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN Being called psychotic made her laughter grow. If only this man knew the real person he was dealing with! "Psychos are psycho whether dunk or not, olman!" Her words were gently said despite her insanity glowing on her face. She was just enticed by the fact that they were having such an unusual conversation, and let's face it, she was insane anyway in some ways... "Did I not introduce myself? I am Lay-dee Br-" she struggled to say her own name, but managed it soon after. "Lady Briar, kitten of chaos! Did you not know, olman? This just makes it all the more purrfect!" Navigating the Maze / (Roll) DH - Maize Run 13 + 15 = 28 Maze Progress: 124 / 500
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN Judging by the walls, and having to go back a few times, Alonso managed to park him and his partner on the right path. Somewhat. The twisted corridors aimed to confuse them, and without a proper layout it was up to fate as whether or not they were able to get out fast. Sighing, the Felis contorted his body to get a better view of Lady Briar, "No, I didn't know who you were, and really just met you by way of your nagging me constantly. The chaos part I can see considering you're acting whacky right about now." Should he even bother telling this kid his own? Not a chance in hell unless Briar found a magical way of recovering from being outright wasted. What else could go wrong. Navigating the Maze / Roll[/roll] 66 + 0 = 66 Maze Progress: 190 / 500
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN As they wandered further, the kitten managed to calm her stupendous laughter, trying to ease her way out of her drunken, codgery mindset. Briar was, in fact, a bit on the crazy side- but she wasn't usually so reckless, in reality, whether in game or not. She was a resourceful person. It had shown more when she nagged him into following her, but slowly, she was losing her mind to the liquor. To her surprise, perhaps because of the ale's aid, she found herself noticing the corn's density, the air sneaking into her nose and giving an unusually strong odor that made her believe she could navigate faster in one direction than another. She ran back to him to grab his hand. "Olman! It's this way, I know it!" Tugging on her companion, she showed the way to the shortcut with a boastful grin, swiping her hand over the rim of her hat. "Less go, Olman! Until you say neem, I call you Olman. But you're a good Olman~ Not like my Olman~ I like you, Olman!" [OOC: I realized Briar's supposed to be a +5 modifier, not 0 or 15, both of which I did accidentally on my previous two nav posts. Because of this, I edited our result to fit what it should be based on that. So basically, just -10 of what i rolled is put in on purpose) Navigating the Maze / (Roll) DH - Maize Run 46 + 5 + 50 (shortcut) = 101 Maze Progress: 281 / 500
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN "What in the, what the hell. HEY! Where are you taking me," he barked, feeling his body losing balance as Briar grabbed his hand and forced him to one direction. If the amount of drunk the two cats were feeling had not counteracted each other, somehow, there would have been a high chance of Alonso toppling over the smaller cat. Granted, a drunk person was not known to feel great amounts of pain. Something was odd about the direction @Lady Briar was taken him, however, and it felt right. Or rather, as right as the whole situation was able to make this out to be. Sighing, his narrowed eyes focused on their path, "You know, I think you're on to something. Maybe if we turn right about there." He tugged on the other Felis in return, attempting to prod her in a direction that veered off the end of the shortcut. A little less pain in the head region was always nice. Continuing their, trek, the man spoke up again, "By the way, my name is Alonso, not Olman. You know what, you're too goddamn drunk to realize what I'm saying anyways." Navigating the Maze / Roll 75 + 0 = 75 Maze Progress: 356 / 500
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN Perhaps it was because they were going the right way that nothing absurd came up for once. There was not a single caterpillar since the one they'd found, not a child, nothing- just the path ahead, lit by night vision and perhaps the hallucinations of blurring things all at once. Alonso's words half got through and half didn't. It was mostly a matter of Briar not understanding her own words were slurred and sluggish at moments, let alone that other times she started speeding up like a brat on crack. "Don't go telly me you ain't a olman! I know a coja when I smee one!" Perhaps it was the liquor talking, but her attempt to bring in her British wording methods had made her laugh- and, simultaneously, trip on her own feet. She grumbled, pausing as she checked her leg for any wounds, her tail shivering and coiled at her back. "Dun trip, Olman!" Navigating the Maze / (Roll) DH - Maize Run 42 + 5 = 47 Maze Progress: 403 / 500
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN Anymore of this and he was going to practice logging out and getting wasted back in the real world. This was why he did not go to bars. Forget that his daughters insisted on going somewhere fun to find a significant other, because dealing with a wobbling mess did not scream 'entertaining' to the middle aged cat. Rolling his eyes, Alonso let out a slight growl, "In two seconds you're about to throw me into a midlife crisis I don't need if you keep calling me old." Well, she was not wrong in the end. He was getting up there in age. Keeping up a decent pace, the bearish cat man bent down to swoop @Lady Briar onto her feet, "Take your own advice." Perhaps Alonso was being a little too rough with a drunken cat girl. Game mechanics still applied a sense of negative feeling, and getting hurt was still a concept that mattered. Last he checked games were supposed to be an escape from reality. Continuing on their path, stopping a moment to decipher an optimal route, he took a moment to eye his companion again. "So uuuh, hope you realize that after this I'm taking you to a medical stall to stop your... infliction." Navigating the Maze / Roll 39 + 0 = 39 Maze Progress: 442 / 500
80 HP MAX HP 80 EN MAX EN "Lookit you. O'coz you old me." The girl blubbered. Of course, she couldn't say if in reality it wasn't the opposite. In fact, she was almost sure it would be. After all, all people who played games like this besides her were usually little brats, wheren't they? Teenagers and the like loved these bloody things. "If it kelps, I's a codgy too." Her British slang was being distorted, but she could care less. What mattered is she could pretty much see the exit now- and a trash can, which she might just need, not far from it. "Lez get outta here... And I don't need no doc! I AM a doc! Ya hears me olman?!" Navigating the Maze / (Roll) DH - Maize Run 34 + 5 = 39 Maze Progress: 481 / 500
