Open - Iván's Curry House | Page 4

@Rias

"Hehehe, you're silly archer lady. I know you're not a mage, hehehe, you're wearing a quiver and have a bow... hehehe. What is Witch Ops! Hehehe! Good question! Though, I'm a little disappointed you've never heard of it. But you're new, hehehe, so that must be why!

The Grand Witch Crossed her arms and grinned proudly.

"The Witch Ops is my team dark heroes sworn to protect the realm from bad guys! Hehehe, it's our job to keep everyone, including NPCs safe! But, hehe, since we're dark heroes we can do sneaky things like sabotage, and be smug when we beat up the villains!"

Getting more excited with each word, Majolica continued her explanation.

"All Witch Ops members have to go through a trial to become official, but after that you're in! Then you get special perks like sitting at the cool table in this restaurant, hehe, because it's owned by one of our members! We also will be going on trips, training to become the strongest players in the world, and helping each other out with things! Hehehe! Since we're dark protectors of the world, we all have to become to strong enough to defend the world from even the most powerful threats! That way, no one gets hurt when something evil appears! Hehehe, but we can't just work hard all of the time, so we also do fun things! Hehe, relaxation is important too! And you're in luck, hehe, because we don't have anyone who uses a bow yet... so, if you come to the training thing, hehe, and you mush well with everyone and want, then maybe we can talk about you joining up officially! Hehehe! Most of the people sitting at this table are already members! Hehehe, some of us aren't here right now though. But all of the others here will agree that we're by far the best group of dark heroes in all of the world! Hehehe!"

As she finished her explanation of The Witch Ops, Majolica turned as she heard the door open. Upon seeing who it was coming into the restaurant, her eyes went wide.

It's Bandit Goblin Gardener!

Standing up, Majolica pointed to the newcomer. As she did, her broom stopped sweeping around the area, and turned into a horizontal position with its bristles facing the woman that just came in... the aptly named Bandit Goblin Gardener...

"Hehehe... I told you I'd find you, you little Bandit Goblin Gardner! Hehehe, did you come to ask for a job watering the indoor plants? Hehehe, or did you just come to pretend that you're not a dirty stealing, stinky Bandit! Hehehe! Why are you here Bandit Goblin Gardner? Did you come to cause trouble? Hehehe, I won't allow it! Hehehe, I've gotten even stronger since the last time you saw me, hehe, and don't forget, the last time we met I almost trapped you in the Grand Witch Majolica Cage of Unhappy Interrogation! Hehehe! Dirty, stinky, little Bandit Goblin Gardener dummy... hehehe..."

@Iván Carl @Rias @Madison Freebird

 

The place was simple, with barrels of ale decorating the homely interior and the hearty scent of curry perfuming the tables. The restaurant seemed to differ from the high-end shops that littered Stokbon's streets and obviously drew inspiration from the plentiful taverns that dotted the edges of Falderen's borders and Astorea's markets. All in all, this didn't seem like a place that Alpha would normally frequent, her being a more regular customer at bakeries and confectioneries instead of proper dine-in facilities. The struggle to keep herself in her seat without blasting through every corner of the room, doing jumps and flips, was apparent. A bead of sweat ran down her forehead, smearing her eyebrow as her legs shook in anticipation, obviously unused to being unmoved for such a long period of time. Her chin was stuck to the table, face hidden behind a menu larger than her chest.

Her nose was practically dying at this point, the strong, sharp stench of curry wafting through her nostrils and practically killing anything that lived there like a particularly vile acid. She raised her hand, placing the menu down, her face tightened to stone. After a minute of waiting, she waved it, hoping that the pink-haired girl at the front would take notice.

She stifled a groan as she went unnoticed. She didn't want to try to make too much of a commotion, preferring to surprise Ivan with a big bouquet of venus flytraps when she had the chance. It was by pure word-of-mouth that she had heard about Ivan's new business venture in the first place and she took the chance to visit her old apprentice and friend. He was like a son to her in that regard and she wanted to give him all the support she could, even if she disagreed with what he was planning to do. By the smell of the place, she could already tell that whatever she ordered would guarantee herself a visit to the hospital and a severe case of food poisoning. A tiny part of her hoped that this was all a prank and that Ivan had cast a mass illusion over the entire populace. A sham. A scam. Anything other than this.

She gulped, nose scrunched. "Waiter?" she called weakly. To be quite honest, she didn't want to be heard at all and, with the presence of the pink-haired witch that occupied the seat next to her, it seemed as if her wishes would come true. On any other occasion, Alpha would happily bounce next to the girl and hold a rapt conversation, the girl's energy matching Alpha's own (or, perhaps, exceeding it in this moment). The sickening churn in her stomach held her in place.

She eyed the menu, a big plate of curry proudly standing forefront on the cover. She was one second away from blowing this entire place up to kingdom come. "Waiter?" she called again. Second time's the charm and, if her third attempt didn't work, then she was sure that she'd go through with her plans and gain Ivan's attention a different way: planting explosives around and detonating this stinking hell-hole.

The venus flytraps, all potted and content with the fresh meal of a giant mealworm she had fed them, curled in on themselves. If this didn't hurry up then the rancid aroma of the curry would kill all of them before Ivan could even set his eyes upon Portia, the loveliest flytrap of them all.

 

Well, it certainly made sense that Iván couldn’t just give away his secrets just like that. Janet huffed a little to herself as she sat back down at the table. She was a little needlessly offended anyway. It wasn’t as if she was going to start a rival restaurant, she just wanted to replicate her delightful experience in her own home, away from Iván’s shop. It didn’t occur to Janet that was just as valid of a reason for a restaurant to conceal its recipes—whether for commercial or home use, that wasn’t how a business made a profit. Not being a business owner or having the faintest idea how to do so, Janet settled for just sulking and eating her brown lamb curry (the chili paste she’d specifically requested remained untouched.)

It seemed they had a show to enjoy at the table! Janet had never condoned magic shows (they were full of lies and trickery) but Majolica’s powers seemed innocent enough, though the curly straw she made wasn’t quite as impressive a display as she’d hoped. Part of her wanted the Commander of the Witch Ops to dazzle the outsiders, wow them with her talent and creativity as Janet had been. Oh well. I suppose she’s busy eating, so one can only do so many things at once. A little disgruntled, the brunette felt the need to bolster the display by tossing her hair and saying “That’s only the beginning, of course. We’re not actually witches, by the way.” She felt this disclaimer had to be added—the only “witchy” aspect was Majolica herself, honestly, or Janet wouldn’t have stood for such pagan nonsense.

“How did you know what I was thinking?” Janet asked @Grand Witch Majolica —that information about the cavities was far too specific! Could the pink-haired girl actually peek into her mind? Janet delicately placed her napkin in her lap and put her fingers on her temples, thinking intently of a frog (why a frog? Because it was Majolica. She didn’t know.) Frog. Frog. She’d finished her curry already and would certainly not be trying the “candy” version if she ever did come back. Brown Curry was the epitome of perfection. “It’s excellent,” she confirmed absentmindedly for @Rias , still thinking frog as hard as she could. “And we all have different frogs. I-I mean, powers. If the Commander says you’re welcome, you should certainly attend the next initiation ceremony.” This was starting to sound like a sorority.

 

"Hmm," Iván shifted his attention back towards the archer (@Rias) as she finally made her order. Well, to be fair, it was @Janet Reilly who made her order for her. Was that fair? The archer did ask for a recommendation and Iván had failed to give it to her. If anything was anyone's fault, it was Iván's. He sighed as he conceded to how own thoughts, simply nodding at the archer to gesture that her order has been considered. "Brown curry it is. I'll be back in a jeff." The correct term was a jiff, or more precisely a jiffy, but at that exact moment, Iván felt a strange premonition of something awkward and strange that his thoughts and his mouth decided to go with something awkward and strange instead of correct and precise.

He was on his way to the kitchen when the door swung open. Oh, no. Has the harbinger of awkward and strange things finally arrived? Iván swallowed air, suddenly sweating, and stopped dead in his tracks. He tried to fight his curiosity but failed miserably. Slowly, he turned towards the door, his head more precisely while the rest of his body simply froze where he stood. He had a bad feeling about things and dreaded what he was going to see. Well, what he supposed he was going to see.

Fortunately it was just @Madison Freebird. Iván sighed, relieved that it was just another goth, was she emo?, and not some ridiculous, rainbow-loving, insane person. He raised a hand, failing the simple gesture of a wave, and motioned towards one of the chairs and tables that were all over the place. "Yes. You may choose to sit at a table or at the counter. One of our staff will be with you shortly. Welcome to Iván's Curry House," he greeted her dryly and immediately went back towards the kitchen. One of their customers had been waiting for her order. He didn't want to disappoint.

It only took him a few minutes before he was back out on the floor, the brown curry in hand. He carefully made his way back to the archer, to her table, and with a grin behind her mask, presented her the brown curry he had been toiling over...for a few minutes. It was, well, it was a brown curry. There was nothing special about it. It was just an ordinary brown curry. The only thing that made it special was the way it tasted, how delicious it was, how perfect the combination of spices and flavor were. It was close to the real thing and Iván was mighty proud of the recipe, all thanks to those weird cookbooks he had taken from that crippled alchemist during his first quest that also involved Madison Freebird. "Enjoy your meal," he deadpanned to the archer before making his way towards the aforementioned avian-named woman.

That was when he noticed her. About three to four steps away from the archer's table and Iván suddenly stopped walking. He just stood beside a table, the table of a familiar face. "A-Alpha?" His heart stopped beating. Well, not really. His heart rate actually went up. Behind his mask, his eyes had widened in shock, in horror. He also swallowed more air, and a bead of sweat fell down the side of his face. His worst nightmare had come true. After all these days, weeks, he's finally come face-to-face once more, well, face-to-mask, with his mentor and attempted murderer, @Alphabet Chocolate. If he could, Iván would've run, but as it stood, get it?, he was frozen in place. He turned his head around, towards everyone else, wondering if they would all turn into curry, too. That would be the worst.

 

The Potential Terrorist: @Alphabet Chocolate

Darko had finished the preparations for the next batch of curry that the head chef would prepare later. He was also finished with the next batch of his specialty curry. There was nothing much to prepare in the kitchen, except it would be a custom order like that sweets-loving witch. And so he decided to prepare the brewing apparatus for hot chocolate and the... wait what did that faerin from the Lightning Ironworks say? Ah, oh yes, gazogenes. Well it should be odd that they had carbonated beverages in this world, but at least he could make it gourmet. And there were endless possibilities when it comes to carbonated drinks.

"Waiter." Darko heard that call while he prepared the gazogenes to pour his carefully crafted cola-flavored liquid and fruit juices within the lower spheres of the containers. He made sure that the liquids were chilled thanks to the container of Hylands ice harvested within the off-hours of the restaurant, so that it would lessen the chances of the container exploding. As he was preparing the drinks, he then noticed the owner preparing a dish of curry to be served towards another customer outside. He then wondered why, maybe the woman was serving too much customers. As Ivan went out of the kitchen, he then screwed the caps of the gazogenes back, and then placed those already with contents in the ice compartment. At least he had the cola, the grape soda and the orange soda at the ready. He then moved outside to see the matter through by himself, and then he saw something odd. As he stared at Ivan, he seemed petrified at the sight of a single girl at one table. He then heard him muttering... so this was the Alpha he was talking about, eh? Not that astronaut that he had served chocolate curry earlier? He then went towards Ivan and then said, "You can man the kitchen for the meantime. I will handle this." Tipping his hat, he went away from Ivan and towards the girl he called as Alpha.

As he moved soundlessly towards the girl, he then noticed her apparent innocence and playfulness in her demeanor. He really wondered why Ivan was afraid of such a girly girl... until he saw those potted Venus flytraps at the ground. Well it would look like this girl had a twisted soul, and those qualities she exudes, were signs that this girl could be a potential terrorist, reveling in everything she destroyed and killed. Well these kinds of reasons was why Darko was always assigned with the difficult customers, as he could handle a situation flawlessly. If she would not cause chaos, that will be fine, but if she wanted to cause chaos, there will be chaos - and he will have her pay for all the damages.

At the girl's second shout of "Waiter!", he would just make himself known at her back, asking, "What is your order miss?" He would then smile in a deviant but inviting manner.

 

Not sure why, but the curry house quickly turned into an on-site recruitment for Witch Ops. Corvella would feel sorry if the archer girl got dragged into Witch Ops business, but hey, they were all only having fun up until this point! Except that moment with the corrosive, big slime. That thing was not funny, curse that owl.

Finishing up her plate of curry, she held the urge to order another serving. "Oh? Tell me more about this scroll, Commander Majolica." Somehow she had been immersed in the role of being a Witch Ops subordinate so quick, asking @Grand Witch Majolica enthusiastically while getting that very last sip of the wine. Opportunity to learn more about the art of magic is a big priority on her list, especially after the business at Black Wolf Bandit's Fortress. The knight felt that she hadn't been growing in terms of skills for some time, and realized she would soon be in the shadows of her comrades. She would do anything for training and learning new things.

More and more people continue to come, starting to crowd the rather small restaurant. The weird about it is that the customers are all females, no chance that this is just a coincidence. Is there some illusion at play? The one that might only attract females to this place, maybe? Nah, she might be just overthinking it.

It seems that Majolica really like to address people as goblins... Space goblin, Bandit Goblin Gardener (How in the seven heavens did Majolica invent that name, really?) The woman, dressed in the dark, was not even close to looking like a bandit, let alone a gardener. They might be Majolica's friends, that would explain that she only gives the goblin nicknames for her close friends.

 

Alpha coughed, a burning sensation tickling the back of her throat. Suddenly, she was hacking over the table. A flash of red. She looked down at the stained table. "Oooh, I knew that spicy strawberry peppermint wombo-combo was a bad idea," she lurched, a stinging pain in her ribs rendering her negligent enough to remained unalerted to Ivan's nervous presence. A move to look up at whoever had spoken up, word muddled, was met with a wince. "Ow, ow, ow. Let's not do that."

She sat unnaturally still for a minute, waiting for her revolting stomach to calm from the baleful snack she had feasted on a few hours prior to visiting the curry establishment. If she wasn't busy being in pain, she would've probably cried upon noticing that she'd crushed Portia underneath her weight, the venus flytrap unmoving forevermore. Luckily, she was spared the unnecessary heartbreak as the predicament she found herself in spared no second of rest.

Her fingers dug into her palm and, desperate for relief, she clutched the stem of her bouquet like a lifeline and, bringing up the number of flytraps to her mouth, she bit down hard. It was a hot knife melting through butter; her teeth clamped onto the pitiful plants and hastily separated the stalks in half, ripping it apart like a pack of wolves devouring a lonesome piece of prey. The pressure did little to ease the ache but, being in a game-world and all, the pain subsided soon after and she found herself panting.

She looked down at the puddle of bile. She licked her lips. "Well, that's a waste."

And she promptly spent the next several moments debating whether or not to slurp the sugary vile. Well, she would've if she hadn't remembered that someone had spoken up beside her and she turned to reassure the person that she didn't carry some sort of contagious disease and she was completely willing to sign an autograph if they wanted.

She blinked at the familiar face. Twice. No reaction.

And then she grinned, kicking the table over in a knee-jerk reaction and pulled Ivan into a tight embrace, a bit of colored drool running down her chin sticking to Ivan's clothes like a paper towel soaking in a bucket of cleaning detergent. "Ooooh, it's been forever! Why don't you ever call? Did you know how worried I've been?! You could've been ravaged by mutated turtles that were trained by a gigantic rat in ancient Japanese ninja martial arts! Murdered in an alley by a mobster, leaving your son alone to become a midnight vigilante dressed in dark spandex like a bat furry! You!" she released him from her death-grip, staring at him straight in the eyes. "I've spent all my good years raising you and this is what I get?! You never answer my calls, your older brother ran off to elope with Rudolf, and you opened...this monstrosity!" she gestured to the entirety of the place. "I could've paid for your college education, Ivan! You should've gotten a doctorate at least! You could've went to Yale or Harvard or-or-or Princeton or something! I would've been happy even if you moved out of country to become a professor of philosophy if you just kept in contact! Your dad would be disappointed in you!"

Her voice was impassioned, fully believing the momentary delusion she founded herself in. In this moment, she wasn't Alphabet Chocolate: Illusionist Extraordinaire, Adventurer, Noble-of-some-rank-no-one-knows. She was Alphabet Chocolate: Mother of Six, Retiree, Member of the Fishing Club of Greater Astorea; and her son didn't even bother keeping in contact after running away from home all those decades ago. Tears fluttered on the edges of her eyes, threatening to pour like a waterfall at a second's notice.

What is your order miss?

She looked over to the man who interrupted her lovely recap of the previous seasons of her soap opera. Was this a fourth-walling breaking episode? She wished she had the script here with her so she could understand what was going on. Where was the camera crew? Well, it was time for improvisation. She detached herself from Ivan.

"I'd like to engorge myself on your insignificant human souls and the miasma of the world. I want to consume the very life that runs through your veins; the feelings of terror, horror, and monachopsis. I wish to feast on the essence of the universe. I hunger for the physical manifestation of death."

Her fingers curled, her face darkened by the light. She looked positively maniacal. And then she stepped onto the table, which had been toppled over a while ago, and balanced herself on one of its legs which proudly reached up to the ceiling. Booming thunder thrummed at her ears. "I am Alphabet Chocolate! And I..." she paused. "I wanna try your curry. This is a curry house, right? What else do you guys have here? Curry ice cream? Even I think that'd be a bad idea. Just curry, please."

@Darko Ljubicic @Iván Carl

 

Majolica kept a weary eye on The Bandit Goblin Gardener (@Madison Freebird ) as she came into the restaurant, but continued to field questions from the others as she did. After all, in Majolica speak, being labeled a "goblin" made you just the absolute worst in The Grand Witch's book.

Majolica turned to @Janet Reilly to answer her question.

"Hmm, hehe, how did I know that you were thinking that I would get cavities? Hehehe.... it's because I can read minds.... hehehe. Not really though, hehe, every time I eat with people they have the same thought because of the candy and mushrooms. Hehe, so I always have to explain that witch's don't get cavities. Hehehe, or tummy aches, I can eat any kind of mushroom, poisonous or not, and be okay! Hehehe, mushrooms are witch foods after all!"

Turning back to the others, Majolica reiterated Janet's point. There was only one witch in the group, because there was only one real witch in the world. The Grand Witch, and that was Majolica.

"Hehehe, and Janet is right! I'm the only witch! The Witch Ops are named after me, hehehe, but everyone else is just a powerful hero! Hehehe, and that's because there's only one real witch in the whole world! And that's me! Grand Witch Majolica! Hehehe, see how I have a hat AND a broom. If someone says their a witch and doesn't have a broomstick, then they're just dumb old fibbers! Hehehe!"

Turning to @Corvella Majolica tried to remember all the detail of the scroll.

"Hehehe, well it was a long time ago. I was on an adventurer with a nature druid lady that wanted to explore an old ruin. Hehe, the ruin had already been pretty much picked dry, but we found a secret basement! So we went into the basement, hehehe, and then bam! There was a huge monster down there! So, naturally, I, as The Grand Witch obliterated the monster with her help! Hehehe! Then, after that we searched the room and found this area with all of these scrolls. The druid lady took the nature scrolls I think, I took the illusion and the black magic one! Hehehe, the problem was, I couldn't read them! The illusion one had all of these weird letters that disappeared and reappeared. Hehehe, so the page was always different, but I think there was a pattern or something. I didn't study in that closely though, hehe. I don't' really know who put it there or when, hehehe, but I'm sure it's ancient! So, it might have some really neat and powerful stuff! Of course, someone would have to translate it... hehe."

As The Grand Witch chatted it up with her friends and potential new allies, she couldn't help but notice a loud, manic individual embrace Ivan. She knew nothing about the woman, but she knew that she immediately didn't like her. Maybe it's because she seemed like a more bubbly, less cute, version of herself, or possibly because she was bouncing off the walls, but something about the woman seemed off. This feeling was exasperated when she jumped up on the table and started making loud exclamations. This wasn't her restaurant, she was getting it dirty. This was a new Witch Ops hangout. If she kept it up, Majolica would have to step in. She couldn't let some weirdo just have her run of the place.

@Corvella @Iván Carl @Janet Reilly @Rias @Alphabet Chocolate @Madison Freebird

 

Iván grimaced as he stood there watching @Alphabet Chocolate...be Alphabet Chocolate. He tilted his head, a combination of confusion and concern washing over his face behind the red mask that once belonged to a deadly predator from down in the Spire as its face. That statement would come off pretty disgusting, but it was debatably not as disgusting as Alpha throwing up on her table and eating some sort of plant. Debatably. Wait, were those Venus fly-traps? Why would she have them? Why not? It was Alpha, after all, and nothing about her made sense, which was, to be fair, an interesting respite from all the seriousness of this game-world.

"Are you okay?" Iván deadpanned, though he was somewhat worried with what just happened with Alpha. She seemed sick or something. Can Alpha even get sick? He's seen her do weird things, that often, he'd forget she was an actual Player. It was her genius in the art of illusion magic that made her seem unreal, which was perhaps the point, but there was still a person behind the avatar...right? There was an actual person playing this strange, whimsical, over-the-top character, right? "Do you need---"

He was about to recommend a medic to Alpha but his words and his thoughts were cut-off when she grabbed him, trapping him in a massive, deceptively powerful, bear hug, the first intimate contact Iván had ever had since he started wearing that stinky five-holed red mask from the Spire and doubling down with all the stink by carrying with him the equally rancid ant juice from the Ant Queen during his first mission with the Aristocracy. In a manner of speaking, Iván was basically a walking, scary dumpster at first glance...and at first sniff. The fact that Alpha seemed immune to his smell, well, that spoke about how powerful this tiny girl really was. She was, is, his mentor after all.

Iván tried his best to push the oblivious Alpha off of him but to no avail. She went on and on about the same crazy things she always did, things that barely made sense to Iván, to anyone with a normal brain. A few of the things he did get, like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reference and the Batman reference, two iconic franchises from decades ago. Oof! Alpha's player was probably an elderly woman living alone in her decaying mansion. That would explain a lot.

Gah! She finally let him go. Iván scrambled to breathe, pushing himself upright with both hands on Alpha's table. Gah! again! He almost came close to touching her vomit. Iván fought the urge to vomit because of Alpha's vomit, not realizing the irony in how he himself was a walking source of other people's vomits. Vomits was a word, right? Like the plural and not the verb? Probably.

He narrowed his eyes towards Alpha as she continued babbling, spewing out some sort of parental anguish. Who was Rudolf? Was that a reindeer reference? And the calls... Iván's never received a call from her. Not since she sent him that weird, stalker-ish message about meeting with her the first time. That was a nightmare. Well, it really wasn't, but Iván had to stick to this gimmick of being weirded-out by his mentor. It was their thing. Probably.

"Stop it, mom," the words slipped out of his mouth before he could think them over. He stopped, horrified at his subconscious feeding Alpha's insanity. Oh, no! Thankfully, @Darko Ljubicic arrived to save his butt. Again. He should probably give him and his top hat a raise at this pace. Wait, was he paying them? Oh. He should probably check up on that. Maybe he actually was. Or were they paying him? Who was paying who? Gah! Too many things to think about! He just wanted to feed people curry!

Curry ice cream? An evil smile found itself on Iván's lips. It was one of the reasons he was grateful he chose to wear the red mask, he always chose to cover his face. A manner of surprise. No one ever got to know what he was really thinking behind the masks and the goggles. He was a big box of surprise, a stinking box of surprise. Feed her curry ice cream... He whispered to himself, snickering in his head. ...with lots of ant juice. He turned to Darko, mistakenly thinking the top hat curry man could read his mind.

 

Immensely relieved that Majolica wasn’t one of those psychic mind-readers from TV (but embarrassed that she’d thought so) Janet put her fingers down from her temples and allowed her mind to wander again. It was particularly easy to think of things that weren’t frogs, especially since the newest patron of Iván’s restaurant had just eaten a plant. Viciously. Without silverware. Is there something wrong with her? Janet found herself on her feet , looking around for a waiter or Iván or someone to take care of the disturbance and get this poor, disturbed girl to the hospital. Fortunately, the masked business owner and Darko as well were already on the case. Janet slowly sat back down in her chair again, feeling faint, not taking her eyes off @Alphabet Chocolate with the mixed horror and fascination of someone watching grubs squirm inside a rotten log.

What was happening? It was impossible to continue sitting and chatting with the others as if nothing out of the ordinary had occurred, especially when the black-haired girl was making such a dramatic scene. Majolica was making an admirable effort (the One True Witch could certainly hold up her end of any given conversation, that was no issue here) but Janet couldn’t even focus on her. Color rushed to the brunette’s face as a table was kicked over and she tried to make alarmed eye contact with @Iván Carl through his mask and goggles (impossible, obviously) as if asking do you need help? The man seemed calm despite being grabbed and shouted at, but… exactly how much of the girl’s speech was true?

“Should we… do anything?” Janet whispered, casting @Grand Witch Majolica and @Corvella a sidelong glance. “This is quite the ruckus. I hope it doesn’t affect Iván’s business.” Thank goodness everyone in there right now seemed to already be acquainted with the stinky illusionist, this… odd, plant-devouring girl included. Ordinarily Janet would wonder if she was indeed Iván’s mother in real life and had finally tracked down her son in a dramatic video game confrontation, but considering the strange vomit and other behavior… Is she out of her mind? If Janet was honest, she was a little afraid to interfere. Waiting for some signal from Iván or Majolica, the eighteen-year-old clenched her napkin tightly in her lap and continued to watch the scene unfold.

 

Had you ever seen ripe tomatoes harvested from holistic farms? The bright red nuggets that flashed scarlet, untouched by any other color on the spectrum other than the plentiful shades of red. Even the stem, green from chlorophyll, is tinged with the tiniest specks of carmine. Imagine that lovely produce and paste it on the grisly face of a girl currently going through the early stages of puberty. A bright red, oily tomato.

Alpha had gushed in pure delight at Ivan's acknowledgement of her as his mother and, even after addressing Darko Ljubicic with her order minutes afterwards, it seemed as if the stellar response hadn't diminished a single bit. She stood enraptured, completely oblivious to the ongoings around her. Janet's own whispers to Majolica and Corvella went unnoticed as her eyes glimmered and shone with the glee of a thousand youth chorus groups (get it? Glee? Chorus? Pun?).

It hadn't even been a full thirty seconds after she had requested a bowl of bonafide curry that she grew restless, the deceased shreds of her venus flytraps cushioning her bottom as she jumped up and down in her seat, grabbing a few utensils around her to slam atop the upside-down table. "Oooh, this is taking forever!" she bemoaned, a petulant temper rising within her. She looked around, searching for something to do. Maybe she could climb the ceiling and swoop down from the skies like a peregrine falcon opening up its claws for prey? Or maybe she could pretend she was inside a stealth-strategy game and she had to navigate through the restaurant undetected. She had even contemplated the age-old game of 'The Floor is Lava' for a brief second before she chanced a glance over to the other patrons.

A lightbulb flickered atop her head, figuratively (unlike Ivan who had a pseudo-bomb lightbulb perched up there not too long ago). She grabbed the hinges of her chair and, lifting it up from the floor, she slid across the room and closer to where the others sat (@Janet Reilly @Corvella @Grand Witch Majolica). "Hey there!" she waved, head extended like a snapping turtle or a chicken reaching out to peck corn kernels. "Nice to meet you guys! Name's Alphabet Chocolate, watcha guys doin'?"

She paused abruptly, face twisted into an exaggerated replication of The Thinker. It was quiet for a few moments more before she stood up and, bending her knees, leaped back over to Ivan. "C'mon, I found new friends!" she insisted, grabbing Ivan by his sleeve and attempting to drag him back. She glanced back and forth and, hoping that there would be no eavesdroppers, she leaned in and said: "I think there's a pretty girl there I want to make my daughter-in-law! I need grandchildren, y'know!"

She winked, completely clueless to the fact that she hadn't whispered the secretive words at all. Her voice, as loud as ever, practically announced it despite her contradictory wishes and, proud that she had clued Ivan into what she had expected of him, she continued to try and get him to budge. "Grandchildren!" she hissed.

 

Just stay perfectly still.

Madison stood in the doorway, doing her damnedest to avoid eye contact with @Grand Witch Majolica as she waited for her question to be asked. The technicolor brat's hovering broom shook its bristles at her menacingly, daring the plagueslinger to make the first move.

This is like a bear attack. Except the beast's fur is obnoxiously colored. And her voice cracks. And she's probably forgotten her ADHD medication. ...wait, you're supposed to make a lot of noise to scare bears away, right? ...Mithrandir or whatever her name is is making enough noise to do that, that's for sure.

Ivan shouted something from across the restaurant, telling Madison to grab a seat at the counter or wherever, which she would gladly do as soon as she could get out of the friggin' entryway--

Seconds that seemed like hours passed before the noisy little monster lost interest in her and left to cackle at someone else. Madison sighed through her teeth as she tracked the witch through the curry house, almost willing her to go to the other side and stay there.

Eventually, Maddy thought the coast was clear, and made her way to the counter, where she pulled up a seat and waited for someone to bring her a menu.

 

At this point, Corvella can finally define herself with the title of the most normal customer in the curry house. Both Alphabet and Majolica's antics could result in total obliteration of the restaurant, no, this entire district of Stokbon. "Uh, I don't think we should. She looked like a close friend of Iván." The girl did indirectly imply that she is the stinky guy's mom, and Iván didn't even correct anything at all! So the small girl is really his mom, then. How rude of her to thought that she was his friend.

People should tolerate Corvella's method of deduction, as she mostly mingle with the not-so-sane ones.

The blonde suddenly find Iván's mom standing around her, uh, their table. Should she refer her as Ms. Carl? Corvella turned to the small girl, making the most polite face ever while bowing to her as if @Alphabet Chocolate was a much older woman. "Oh, are you Iván's mother? I'm Corvella. We're, uh, having curry right now. Your son makes good foods." She gave a thumb up. There wasn't any meaningful conversation before Iván's mom decided to comically leap to her son. Looks like she really wanted to marry off her son already, a great mother that everyone should idolize.

Meanwhile as Corvella scans around the place, the so-called 'Bandit Goblin Gardener' actually ignored all the things Majolica threw at her, much to her surprise. There's still another sane person here in the curry house beside herself. The blonde got up her chair and walked up to @Iván Carl who was still tangled up with his mom to order something because she thought she might be stay longer here to converse with the others. "Excuse me Iván, do you have desserts here? The fruity ones."

 

This is getting out of hand. Although Iván looked calm and collected on the outside, mostly because his face was covered by a red mask, which was previously the face of a deadly predator from down in the Spire, there was a storm deep within him. The feeling was akin to being locked up in a room with nine other people, one of which a corpse of your own making, another a police detective, one a creepy looking Japanese man-boy with baggy eyes and an addiction to sweets and a supercomputer for a brain, and the rest close friends with the stranger whose life you just ended, while you still held the only weapon in that room. It could also be likened to getting caught relieving yourself in a pool during a party thanks to some treacherous chemicals. There was no escape. Iván was trapped in a nightmare.

The owner of the vandalized curry house could have waited for his sous-chef's response to his creepy stare but @Alphabet Chocolate 's short attention span, a term which here means her allergic reaction towards sanity, prevented him from doing so. Not that @Darko Ljubicic was indeed Iván's sous-chef. The masked illusionist didn't really both with such hierarchies. He viewed Darko and @Jasper and @Maeve Lox his equals, mostly because he couldn't remember at that exact moment in time who was paying who. His name was on the sign outside but it could just be because he made that sign. Did he pay anyone to make that sign? Oh, right, he tricked someone into making that sign. Gotta love illusion magic.

He watched with eagle eyes (caw caw!) as his mother, I mean mentor started interacting with the table full of Witch Ops members. Seeing the face @Grand Witch Majolica was making, Iván couldn't help but think uh, oh! and be worried about the state of his restaurant. Past, present, and future. He'd rather not have everything escalate, a term which here means end up with his restaurant exploding, but it was all out of his hands now. Alpha was stronger and better at him in illusion magic and the Grand Witch was the Grand Witch for a reason. If these two ended up colliding with each other, Iván might end up with just the vandalized sign as a souvenir of his venture into the culinary arts.

Wait, did she say grandchildren?! Iván could do nothing else but stare at his mother, I mean mentor in complete disbelief. She knew that procreating in this game was impossible, right? Was marriage even a thing in here? Hmm, he had to look into that. Perhaps he would find all the answers to all his questions once he finally get that second meeting with the otherworldly being from down in the Spire. He must, he must, he must.

Out of the corner of his eyes, Iván spotted @Madison Freebird who had made her way to the counter. He instinctively took a step to go to her and give her a menu list but failed when Alpha's surprisingly strong grip on his sleeve made her quite an efficient anchor to his sinking ship. Like what was previously stated, there was no escape. Iván was trapped in a nightmare.

His full attention was brought back to the Witch Ops table when @Corvella asked Alpha if she was indeed his mother. This is getting out of hand. His horror and concern were momentarily derailed by the knight stating how he was making good food. Compliments were worth more than gold, Iván thought, though gold was still a more suitable payment for all the good food they were making. Compliments couldn't pay the rent, but gold could. Wait, were they paying rent? Oh, right, they weren't. Iván had "secured" the title, the deed, to this place, so he didn't have to worry about things like rent. Aside from that, he was becoming better at using illusion magic. There would be no rent that would be needed to be paid for a long, long time.

"Oh," Iván deadpanned, turning his head in Corvella's direction like a creepy scarecrow monster thing. "Yes, we do have desserts. We have black slime parfait, ant juice ice cream, and spotted...pudding." From behind his mask, he grinned, proud of the versatility Iván's Curry House offered. Then he realized no one was going to see him grin, so he quickly replaced that with a scowl. He sighed as he realized Alpha still had a mighty strong grip of his sleeve. Iván was trapped in a nightmare. There was no escape.

 

"Hah! I like you!" Alpha laughed, reaching up to poke @Corvella on the nose. "Boop!"

The woman had bowed down to her and wasn't that an odd thought? Normally she'd seen people do those things in more formal settings like during the entire coronation ceremony a while back. It seemed as if this Corvella-person was a reasonably wealthy, well-adjusted individual. Polite, nice, and generous in handing out compliments to her wayward son. Alpha's eyes shined at the prospect of having her as part of the family. It seemed as if the Chocolate-Carl line would continue on strong if Ivan would get hitched with this woman. "Yuppers, Ivy's my dearest and best child! Even if he's spending his life making and smelling like curry," her eyes furrowed as she took another whiff of the spicy, revolting smell that seemed to radiate from this place like an incurable armpit odor.

She went on to drag Ivan to the table, with a degree of success, and anchored him down with all her weight. Using her free hand, she reached up (using a chair as a stool) and turned Ivan's neck to face Corvella. "You guys already know each other, right? But you never introduced me to her, Ivy! Shame!" she gave Corvella the most charming smile she could, as to not scare her off. "So, how did you guys meet? And—oh!"

She looked over to their waiter (@Darko Ljubicic). "We'll have everything on the menu! On me! For Corvy and Ivy and everyone on this table!" she grinned, slamming a pouch of gold coins down with a clatter. There was no price she could put on Ivan's well-being and love-life...and the continuation of the family line. Without another word, she pulled on Ivan's back and, using all the might she could muster (which was hopefully enough), she pushed him forward over at Corvella.

"So," she said cockily, eyes glimmering at the possibilities she could see before her. By the end of the day, @Iván Carl will have a fiancee, even if that was the last thing Alphabet Chocolate would ever do. "Tell me about yourself, Corvy! I have to know what it is about you that got Ivy so charmed!"