This little shit. He had tried to make it plain as possible to his challenger that there was a larger plan at stake- one of tricking the NPCs into destroying their own watchtowers, too fueled by sadism to think clearly and prevent their own sabotage. His whole reason for even coming here was to collect bounties on their heads, but rather than run in like a piss-brained fool he had thought out a needlessly complicated and very likely to fail but had it succeeded would have been an impressive story to tell others. Now it was tits up and pants-down, gone out the window with that door slammed in his face. He could no longer clean house with Greg mucking about with his plan. That ship had sailed, and so it was time to come to port with a new plan. Blah blah, other clever things.
He thought quickly of a way to salvage things but there wasn't time enough before Greg had deposited himself into a catapult and challenged the Admiral to do the same. Scoffing as if it were no serious threat, he climbed into his own and stood up in the wooden cradle that normally held rocks for throwing. It seemed fitting for a throw-down to happen in a siege weapon meant for hurling things, so he'd let Greg have this one.
"Loser gets launched, then!" he shouted happily to the crowd, gripping the edge of the basket and shaking it in excitement while letting out a roar of aggression and machismo. He thought quickly about this boy who clearly knew more of him than he knew of the lad... Troubling, that handicap. Still, they had thrown down the gauntlet and there was no turning back from this. Smiling, he began to clap his hands rhythmically, repeating for about ten seconds before the crowd took up the pattern for him to set pace.
"I'm honestly not sure what to make of this jest-
That someone so worthless throws down with the best.
What could you be thinking when you brought your ass here?
Are you suicidal or stupid, or just fucking queer?
Come into my palace and say GOLLY, SIR, GEE!
I'M SO EXCITED I THINK I MIGHT PEE!
See I'm such a big fan, and think you're just great;
I recall your stories as I masturbate!
Well that's quite a compliment that you've gone and paid,
But Admiral don't play that - it won't get you laid.
I live by one rule through the thick and the thin:
When it comes to love-making it's sink or it's quim."
Raising his arms, he gestured across the gap for Greg to begin, hands waving to encourage the crowd to make some noise.
Last edited: Jul 12, 2017